Monday, October 27, 2008

I Wish

Was going through some old articles and poems I wrote for the school magazine and I came across a poem I wrote that was never published and was never shared with anyone. It was a poem about someone special in my life. Do excuse the childish rhymes as it was written a long time ago.

I Wish

Every time I think of her
I wish things between us weren't over
I wish that it still was the two of us
I wish we were still in love
I wish that she would answer my call
I wish she would understand
That I would give my all
Just to make things right again

I miss the sound of her voice
I miss the times when our world was just two-persons-wide
I miss the times when we're on the phone and she talks real low
'cause it's late and her mama doesn't know
I miss the times when we would refuse to hang up the phone
Because neither of us wanted to go to bed alone
I miss the times when warmth was just one call away
She was always there for me, she was the highlight of my day

I miss the time we went skating together
It was the only time we could hold hands
Without being teased by the others
She was able to talk to me freely
Like I was the only one around
She used to hold on to me
Like the only other choice was falling down
We skated around like we had nowhere we needed to go
Nice and slow
And I remember the time we walked back to the others
She dared me to hold her hand but ran when I tried
She looks so adorable when she is shy

I remember the troubled times I was going through
When the world turned against me
And there was nothing I could do
She told me that things were gonna be ok
She always had just the right thing to say
I remember the time we had our very first fight
She refused to speak to me, I couldn't sleep for nights
I remember the way we made things better
Her friends arranged for me to meet her
We never spoked in person before
We were so shy, made me tongue tied even more
It was a cold and rainy day, such romantic weather
We sat down on the floor, side by side with each other
For the first time she told me that she liked me
I was overwhelmed, those words swept me off my feet
I looked deep into her dreamy eyes, I didn't know what to do
But my heart already had the answers, and it made me say
"I like you too!"


Sigh, it's memories like those that brought an end to us
I couldn't stand the way she was able to talk to everyone I knew except me
It made me jealous
It was all cool when we were on the phone
We were as close as lovers can be
But in school, it was a whole different story
It seemed like she didn't even notice the existence of me
Every time she walked pass me I could barely breathe
I wonder whether she knew that she's the only person I could see?
It was torture, and if you were me then you'd be
Wishing someone would shoot me

I wish that I wasn't so selfish
I wish that I was contented with what we had going on
It was special, but now it's gone
The month she left was a month of tears
I tried to make things right but she wouldn't let me go anywhere near
I wrote my apologies and sent it in a card
But nothing was able to get through to her broken heart

I wonder whether she thinks of me
When times get lonely
I wonder whether she remembers the dreams we shared
The sweet laughter we had, the tears we shed
Looking back on things
It's hard not to find it all a little bitter sweet
And it's definitely nice to believe
That someone like her
Could ever love someone like me


I'm so sorry
I never meant for us to end like this

And would gladly turn back the sands of time
If I only had one wish

12 comments:

hanwei said...

gan dong....gan dong.....

Unknown said...

Hey~
It's been a long while I din come over here....
Erm...such a nice one..
I was recalling many memories while I was reading it...
HoHo...when we're young...

Anyway...
曾经拥有,就足够了~
^^v

ah cheen said...

hope u r okay..
yuan lai u all had been though so much.. jia you in life~

yz said...

haih......

- C t t M - said...

LOL thx for the comments...
Even though hanwei n Yz very informative...
haha...

Yea everything seems so beautiful when we were young. Those were the days, huh?
Someone once told me :" 我不要曾經擁有,我要 di di 擁有 (一直擁有 in hokkien)!"
And I agree with that guy... haha...

Yo nhc, thx for dropping by and thx for the wishes. You also have to jiayou in life! You seem more emo than me le... Hope everything is ok with ya...

yewleong said...

mai ko look back liao...
we still got a long road to go

Unknown said...

Who dun wan di di yong you woh~
But sometimes, we dun even hav the choice...
Like wat ur fren said, mai ko look back lo~

siewyin said...

lol..
just drop by here n saw this post..
ahhhh!!!
i miss our life especially form 4 n 5!!!!!!!!

-memories-
=)

- C t t M - said...

Lol yl, so true, 往事只能回味...

I miss those days too! Happiest time of my life for sure.

"有沒有那麼一張書籤 停止那一天 最單純的笑臉和 最美那一年 書包裡面裝滿了蛋糕和汽水 雙眼只有無猜和無邪 讓我們無法無天 "
- Mayday

darthxintor said...

very envy u can write such nice poem... read it already then i remember mine too... actually hor who was tat girl???

YZ said...

LOL
that "haih" include many things ma

the poem la.... reminds me something abt the past, which ended with the 'haih'

it's kinda like a conclusion i guess~

vHsiaN said...

I un u lolx cheer up bah ^^