The Story of Cats and Dogs

Almost through with the first week of the new semester and I couldn't wait till the end of the week to tell all of you a story. The first week started off with the lecturers introducing themselves and the courses that they were gonna teach. A first glance at the schedule and the module leaders and I was relieved that there were no Mr. Anand aka Super Mario. I call him that because he looks like Mario with the mustache and when he teaches, I just want to run away real fast, punch boxes, stomp on turtles, collect coins and disappear into a giant pipe, if you know what I mean. However, there were quite a number of unknown lecturers so I was praying that they were at least at a competent level, but I was SO SO WRONG. Out of 8 lecturers, only 1.5 of them made me not want to skip class for the rest of the year, and out of that 1.5 lecturers, 1 of them have not showed up yet. What are the odds, huh?

One of the useless lecturers reminded me of a story. There was a day when I, Kc, Yz and Tommy went out together. We were eating lunch together at a round table and the seating position was like, Kc was sitting opposite me, while Yz was sitting opposite Tommy. Yz and Tommy were having an intense discussion and I and Kc just couldn't help but laugh at the two of them. If you are like me and know the both of them, you would definitely agree with these facts:

1. When Yz talks to me, I only can hear 50% of what he is saying cause of his Jay Chou like slang, and after I interpret it, I get 90% of his meaning.
2. When I talk to Tommy, he hears 100%, then after he interprets it, he only receives 50% of my actual meaning.

So you could imagine what it was like for the both of them to communicate with each other. It was like a cat and a dog trying to communicate. Yz was talking to Tommy, Tommy only received 50%, then after intepretation, he got 10% of Yz's meaning. LOL!

Now, back to that lecturer of mine, his name is Mr Pu, don't know his full name but I'm guessing that his last name is Ki Mark. I heard from a senior that he talks very softly, so I decided to sit in the first row. What that senior didn't tell me, was that he also has the worst pronunciation known to mankind. Even though he's been teaching for a number of years already, he still speaks like a typical China business man. They somehow mix up all d 'L's and 'R's and makes everything plural. Want any examples? Of course you do!

Mr Pu:" Ret me ask you all a questions. Rets says, you are driving a lolli at the speed of 90km/h, the intefelence due to the motors will detenuates yours pelfolmances of yours cars. How do you leduce the intefelence?"

I turned and looked at the rest of the class, most of them had the same expression on their faces ---> @.@. But I don't blame them, even I who was sitting in the first row was like "WTF?". If Yz and Tommy were like cats and dogs, this guy would be a fish in a pond while we are all humans on the ground. All we can hear from where we're standing are the sound of bubbles rising up to the surface. Bloop bloop or Brrrrrrr, it's up to your imagination. The way he teaches, I hear only 30% of the information he's trying to send out, and after I analyse it, it confuses me more till a point in the end I only understand 15%. By the time the class ended, the average information I registered in my mind without doubt would be around ± 1%. What a waste of not only mine, but everyone else's time! That's friggin' 4 hours a week that I will never get back! I'm already 20 years old, OMG I can't waste anymore of my youth! Somebody shoot him please, the reward will be bountiful. Thanks! =)